‘Anyone can do it when its easy’. That was a phrase our high school cross country coach said during the practices in the Florida late afternoon heat while running ‘Quarters’. Those were the worst! We were forced to run around the track as fast as we can with limited rest before running another lap at top speed. Coach would say that it was only during these hard times that we actually improved our endurance. When we all felt like giving up and walking away from the track, we were reminded that if we wanted to be the best, we had to put in the time and effort.
This reminds me of how hard marriage can be. During the craziness of our day to day we get lost in the constant demands that are pulling at us from every direction. What is so hard is when our own family is draining us the most. I get it, being married is not easy. There are times when we all feel like giving up. But then again, I am reminded that our relationships are improved when we face these storms head-on instead of giving up.
Here are three simple things that I hope will encourage you when your relationship is facing some difficult times.
1. Don’t Give Up
Anyone can do relationships when it is easy.Do not give up. It is a true sign of your character and commitment when you choose to fight for each other during the difficult times instead of against each other. When you are able to fight for each other and overcome these issues, you will feel even closer than you had before these storms and feel more confident during the next difficult season.
2. Seek Support
This is vital. You have to seek out support of those who will encourage you and your relationship. Look for another couple who has endured difficult times to share their story of how they survived. You can also seek out a professional who has the experience to teach some relational and communication skills needed to survive the storms.
3. Get back to the basics
Think back to why you feel in love in the first place. What was it that you used to find attractive about them? What do you still find attractive about your spouse? Focus on the positives to help rebuild the relationship. Get back to enjoying each other, find a sitter for the kids go on a date. Focus on bringing positives back into the relationship to improve your commitment to each other.